very simple

My iMac? Is dead again. I’d like to point out that I got it back from the shop, after over $800 in repairs, only four days ago. I’m back on the powerbook just to post this (and hoping that my internet connection doesn’t go out again, because it’s been ridiculously spotty this week – the cable guy is actually coming between 2 and 6 on Saturday to check it out).

The story – got the mac back on Saturday, spent the day restoring files, re-downloading necessary software, etc. On Sunday, my internet connection started going out regularly (it’ll work for about an hour and then go out again for another 5-6), so I don’t spend as much time as usual on the machine (kind of hard to keep up the morning routine of reading newsfeeds when there’s nothing to feed). This morning, the internet seemed to be up, so I got on the computer. Everything seemed to be fine, until I started getting ready for work – came out of the shower, to discover my (new!) disk drive malfunctioning. The tray kept popping in and out, like someone was repeatedly hitting the eject button on the keyboard. The only way to get it to stop was to power down. So I did, and then I went to work.

Got home today and turned the computer back on. And it won’t boot up. At all. I just get a little folder with a "?" in the middle. I even try to option-start (which is a way of starting up your computer from a diagnostic screen), and there’s no hard drive/operating system indicated. Basically, my computer can no longer even find the hard drive. Which, by the way, is the one component they didn’t replace (even though when I first brought it in a month ago they said they might have to do that).

So I figure it’s one of three options. (a) they fucked up when installing the new optical drive and logic board; (b) they installed defective part(s); or (c) in the three weeks that they held on to my computer (which was two weeks longer than originally promised), they somehow failed to diagnose what was actually wrong with my computer, and installed hundreds of dollars of unnecessary replacement parts instead of a new hard drive.

After a month and a half of this, including defective disks and hours of phone calls to Apple, not to mention spending hours of weekend time waiting for my number to be called at TekServe, all I can think is that they’re playing some sort of huge practical joke on me. That I’m going to walk in there on Saturday and it’s going to turn out that I’m, like, their millionth customer and they’re going to give me a new 20" G5 iMac for all of my trouble.

Because I’m about three seconds away from walking in there on Saturday morning with my 10 pound imac shaped paperweight and a sledgehammer.

I’m still stuck on my powerbook, because the new optical drive for my iMac has still not arrived at Tekserve.

Don’t get me wrong – I love my powerbook, for what it is, which is a useful computer to travel with. That’s why I got the 12" model. But for regular computing, I really need at least my 15" iMac screen – I feel like I’m going cross-eyed after two weeks of this. Not to mention the non-ergonomicness of it all. And the wires running every which way since I have all of my stuff (backup drive, printer) now plugged into the side of the pbook rather than discretely in the back of the iMac.

It’s all just so frustrating. How friggin’ hard is it for them to get an optical drive? I mean, they are put in every computer that Apple makes…

So. I finally got my Tiger replacement DVD today. And I put it in my computer. and it launched, and told me to restart in order to start the install, and I did. And then the computer sat there. For two hours. refusing to start up from the dvd drive. Or do anything. Thankfully, In my first, 6 hour, session with the Apple brainiacs three weeks ago, I did acquire the very useful knowledge of how to force a reboot from the hard drive even when there’s a cd/dvd in the drive. Computer started up fine. Tried installing other software, just to test out the drive. That installed fine.

So I called Apple. again (I’ve now spoken to: Elizabeth, Rob, Erica, Paul and William). My favorite part was where the automated phone tree actually hung up on me twice instead of transferring me to a tech. After I waited on the phone for 15 minutes each time. And then finally transferred me to the "overflow" tech, who had no inkling of how to help me. So then I had to get transferred again. And then, after all of the remarks about my "really extensive" case file, William told me he thought it was my computer, not the disk, because, in his mind, there’s just no way that I could get two faulty disks. Ignoring, of course, the fact that there were apparently hundreds, if not thousands, of these defects floating around the northeast after the Tiger launch.

Never mind that I spent six hours with Elizabeth two weeks ago testing out my entire hardware configuration (his response? "well a lot can happen in two weeks"). or that the drive could read the dvd just fine when it was inserted, but the dvd wouldn’t boot the computer. or that I tested the drive by re-installing one of the myriad of programs that I hadn’t gotten around to installing after my prior hard drive wipe and restoration.

So now I’ve got to drag my iMac to TekServe on Saturday (they being the folks who sold me the original faulty disk) and get it checked out. To make sure I don’t have a "progressive optical disk failure". Which will, of course, be covered not only because I have Apple care, but even if it’s a software problem, Apple’s going to pick up the tab because they’ve given me such a hard time. The tech who lied to me a week and a half ago about my software being shipped out last monday (only to call back this saturday to find out that it was still sitting in the warehouse) was probably what pushed me over the edge.

Ignoring the fact that if you billed out, at my current hourly billing rate, the amount of time that I spent on the phone I could not only buy a new G5 iMac and a flat panel TV, or that I’ve actually bought three apple computers in the past three years (my iMac, my powerbook, and an iBook for my brother), and hence, am an extremely good customer, I’m really losing my faith in the company. Mistakes happen. I get that. Software can be defective. But the complete runaround that I’ve gotten from the company is really souring me. I’m certainly not going to be encouraging others anymore.

It’s a beautiful day outside, but I wouldn’t know it. You know why? Because I’ve now been sitting in my apartment waiting for three hours for my FreshDirect delivery. When I finally called to find out where it was, they started spinning some story about how there was some horrible accident on the Queensboro bridge which was causing delays all over their system. So, okay, I believe them (well, not until I after they give me the facts about the accident that I keep demanding – time, place, etc., but still, I eventually believe them).

Until, that is, I get on the DOT’s website and pull up the live traffic cameras from both the Queens and Manhattan sides of the bridge (living in NYC really does enable me to be so much more of a geek). Where, it appears, traffic is moving just fine. Heck, it even looks kind of light. So now I’m pissed off all over again. I haven’t taken a shower yet today, because, well, I’m waiting for this guy to show up with my perishable food.

My favorite part is where they claim that they called me to let me know that there was this delay, even though I’ve been sitting in my one room apartment all friggin’ morning – I think I’d notice if the phone rang.

I don’t know why I keep ordering from them – they screw up my order constantly, and now this. Oh wait, I know why – the only close grocery store is the vermin-infested Associated two blocks from here, the Whole Foods doesn’t sell diet Coke, and I really can’t carry cases of soda and water 6 blocks from the Food Emporium.

Oh, and my non-corrupt copy of Tiger still hasn’t shown up…

Update: When the FreshDirect driver finally showed up, I asked him about the accident, and he had no idea what I was talking about. His response? "They send me out late, I show up here late." Yup – not only did I sit around until 2pm for my groceries, only to get guilt tripped by the customer service representative because I wasn’t "sympathetic" enough about the "really major" accident, but apparently she was lying through her teeth. Nice? right?

And just to add to my aggravation, I then decided to call Apple again to find out where my replacement Tiger software was. When I spoke to "Rob" last Sunday, he swore up and down that it was fulfilled but sitting at the warehouse, and that it would absolutely ship out on Monday. When I called today, "Erica" investigated and said that it takes at least 3 weeks to complete fulfillment of a replacement order, and that my software hadn’t even shipped yet.

And then my magazine was missing from my NY Times. And I almost cried. Because the magazine is the only reason I have a paper subscription to the Times (weekends only) – I inherited a pretty major crossword obsession from my mother, and the Sunday Times is pretty much the gold standard.

This week has got to end at some point, right?

I’m trying to blame it on Friday the 13th at this point, but this whole week has just been completely bizarre. Things that were out of my control just kept going wrong this week (can’t go into too much detail, it’s mostly work-related). prospectuses that somehow got changed at the printer after we signed off on final proofs, messengers who didn’t follow instructions, and people just generally forgetting things. Instead of doing anything productive, I spent at least 3 mornings this week cleaning up after people. And really, with a deal closing today and another one on Tuesday, and an investor-relations conference that I’m writing a presentation for on Wednesday, I certainly don’t need extra complications…

It’s a darn good thing that I wasn’t planning on going anywhere this weekend, as Manhattanites appear to be trapped on our little island.

The West Side Highway has been shut down thanks to a wall collapse that spilled tons of debris all over the road. And don’t think about taking the train from Jersey, because a rail fire has shut down service between NYC and Newark.

Oh sure, there are still egress points, but I’m pretty sure that most folks don’t want to spend their entire weekend sitting on the Harlem River Drive. Because I’m pretty sure that most of our roads are at or near capacity without losing half of them. On the radio this morning, commentators were suggesting (a) going through Brooklyn and Queens to get out of town (which seems like a really big detour if you’re trying to go west) or (b) taking the day off if you need to commute into the city (They were even joking about the fact that it’s Friday the 13th, so clearly people would want to lock themselves in their homes all day and not even attempt to do anything).

And apparently no one was injured in either of these incidents, which is why people feel free to joke about them. I mean, an avalanche? In Manhattan? I thought we were supposed to be completely devoid of any and all natural phenomena here on our little concrete island.

Apparently, my Safari problems a few weeks ago were only a minor precursor to the hell that was my attempt to install Tiger.

On Saturday, fresh from re-tape measuring the entirety of my new apartment, I stopped off at Tekserve to pick up a copy of Tiger. Got home, dropped it into my disk drive, and got a disk error. Repeatedly. Gave up trying to install at about 1 in the morning.

On Sunday, I went back to Tekserve, and got a new copy. The customer service lady mentioned that I wasn’t the only one having problems (you’d think that this would cause some hesitation on my part, but nooooo, I need to have the shiny new operating system, so I must forge ahead). The new disk? Got about halfway through installing before it crapped out on my too. So I called Apple. Because at this point, I’ve got half an OS on my system. Elizabeth (who is my new best friend, by the way), said that Tiger is actually really picky, and the fact that I had problems with two disks means that it might be a problem with my computer, rather than the disk. So we walk through repairing any disk errors (there were none), and she suggests an Archive and Install, rather than upgrade. So I start that. It does get a little further, but still stops in the middle. So I call Elizabeth back (I have her direct extension at this point). Hours of attempts go by. Finally. I decide to do a clean install, because I back up everything nightly onto a LaCie drive (see? I can be smart sometimes). Still doesn’t work. At this point, my only solution is to do a clean install of Tiger, which I do. Elizabeth and I then start manually copying Tiger folders to my computer, just to see if we can find a problem, because she does agree at this point that it doesn’t look like the problem is my computer.

Well. About halfway through copying the seven thousand or so system files, we start getting file error messages. That certain miscellaneous files cannot be read. In the meantime, I had gotten on my laptop (again with the smart – two computers is pretty handy once in a while) and on the Apple discussion board there appeared to be all sorts of people having similar problems. So we agree that there must be something wrong with the batch.

She’s sending me a new copy (from a different batch, naturally), and they’re going to try and figure out what’s wrong. She thought I was the most awesome customer ever, both because of my patience through the whole process, and my willingness to experiment. And I swear I could hear her doing the dance of joy when I mentioned my rigorous backup routine. Because apparently a lot of customers don’t do that sort of thing…

But I swear. If it weren’t for the fact that Microsoft sucks rotten eggs, and the fact that Apple does have awesome customer service, I’d have thrown my iMac out the window at this point. Because how do you ship an entire batch of corrupt disks on a major launch release? Quality control? something?

I’ve been reinstalling the oodles of software that I had on my computer, and it’s going to take me at least a few more days to get everything up and running…I didn’t lose too much that I can see so far. The biggest loss that I’ve found so far is the contents of my delicious library. Which sucks because I manually entered all the information…

The plus side? My computer does seem to be running a heck of a lot faster…I guess that’s what happens when you completely wipe it of three years worth of scattered files…

Stay tuned for my further attempts…

My love of Apple computers generally knows no bounds (and it’s love of the product, not corporate policies like suing bloggers, that I’m talking about), but once in a great while? They border on wintel levels of incompetence. Like this week. They released a "minor" update to the operating system, which was supposed to enhance certain functions prior to the launch of Tiger. But instead? This happened. And obviously not just to me.

I even tried all of the workarounds suggested in the apple support forums, but, unfortunately, none of them worked for me. So I resorted to the ultimate workaround. downgrading to Safari 1.2. For me, Safari wouldn’t just crash when encountering java, it wouldn’t launch at all. The icon would bounce up and down in the dock for about 30 seconds, and then I’d just get an error message that it crashed. And while I temporarily switched over to Firefox (you know, to access those pesky support forums), I couldn’t change my default browser because, well, you can only control that from inside Safari. So that kind of sucked. Hopefully there’ll be a fix in a few days (or I’ll just wait to upgrade to Tiger (and Safari 2.0) on the 29th). But this certainly isn’t the best way to encourage your user base to go out and spend another $129 in two weeks on a product was being developed at the same time…

…but sometimes I could do without the apartment neighbors. Tonight, as I was watching The Amazing Race, i start hearing this really odd sound. Pause the TV to investigate, and discover streaming water pouring out of my bathroom ceiling. After numerous calls to the idiot doorman, who didn’t seem to understand that "call the super, I have an emergency" didn’t actually mean "wait 20 minutes and then come upstairs yourself to do nothing but stare at the bathroom ceiling (leaving the front door unwatched in the meantime) without even the super’s phone number", the super finally stopped by. He had already been upstairs, where he discovered that the brilliant upstairs neighbor had a broken showerhead that was spraying water all over the bathroom (and hence leaking into my apartment), and instead of getting it fixed, just let it keep leaking until it not only wore away at his tile floor and grouting, but came through my ceiling.

Yeah. sometimes I think moving to the woods with no neighbors for miles might be just the thing.

Then I remember that not having neighbors doesn’t rid you of household repair issues, and waiting 20 minutes for the super doesn’t seem so bad.

I can’t believe I forgot to mention this one in yesterday’s post. When I went to see Bride and Prejudice, I sat next to yet another in a long line of inconsiderate movie patrons.

I got to the move 20 minutes early (as I do), and took the aisle seat. two other women (one pregnant), took two of the inside seats (one seat away from me). I happily joke with the pregnant lady that I’ll of course move out of the way for whenever she needs to use the restroom. The theater was maybe half full.

As the lights are dimming, girl rushes in, and sits in the middle seat. Even though there are plenty of other more easily accessible seats. Ok, not a big deal – it’s an empty seat – a little weird that she wedged herself in between two people when there were plenty of others, but hey, to each his own. Here’s where the real fun starts though. She then spreads out, coat arms and what not spilling over in the both mine and pregnant lady’s seats, and she *accidentally* pushes my arm off the armrest. Yeah, so not happening. My arm is back there in about a millisecond.

She then proceeded to make three phone calls during the film.

And here’s the kicker – she stole my cupholder. I had my bottle of water in the armrest that was between us since before she got there (we each had an empty one on the other side, so it’s not like I was "stealing" hers). I’m left handed, so it was the logical spot for me, and, well, I was there first. About 10 minutes into the film, I take a drink, and when I go to put the bottle down, her coffee cup is now sitting in my cupholder. It’s like she was waiting for the second I would give up the space so that she could pounce right in.

I’m sorry, but does anyone remember the days when the last person into the theater had to sit in the front row? Or when you were appropriately grateful, after showing up late, that there was a seat at all that you didn’t start elbowing your neighbors?

I know this is all incredibly petty stuff, but I’m about ready to ditch going to movies altogether and just start waiting for the DVDs. I haven’t been to a movie in months where I haven’t been surrounded by people who seem to think that they’re in their own living room.